GOMO! (R) A Choice for Character

GOMO!^® A Choice For Character

Recent reading has led me to the discovery of a new career option. Garbage. Max Lucado, popular author, writes of a Harvard educated researcher who is a “garbologist.” This man finds meaning in our garbage. His organization, The Garbage Project, travels the country to find and examine our trash. Food, papers, junk- all of it tells a story, thanks to the research of this group. Lucado goes on to make the link between the learning found in trash and the learning that we can discover in the daily rubbish that we endure. He suggests that life’s major junk of lies, deceits and betrayals as well as the more minor daily junk of computers freezing up, speeding tickets to accept, and work days that last well into the night give us opportunities to respond with courage and hope for something higher. Each of us has a story of hopelessness and a story of hope depending on our response to the event. In our betrayals and conflicts, do we focus on exacting revenge or do we focus on exacting higher character?

Chase’s Directory of important dates gives July as “Cultivate Character Month.” One mark of character is the ability to respond with heart and head to conflict rather than reacting with revenge. The seduction of revenge is that it can have the sweet smell of success initially. We cleverly twist a phrase or plot an action that plays effectively for getting even. Perhaps no one else ever knows what we’ve done or, maybe we’re even lauded for our cleverness. But as we face ourselves in the mirror we know this “Piece of Truth^sm.” A choice for ego was a choice against high character. So what’s the alternative for a new and improved character response? Consider the concept of GOMO!^® . Say it out loud. GOMO!^®. It’s the reasoned and heartfelt choice to “Get Over it; Move On!”

GOMO!^® covers the incredible power of forgiveness and mercy. If there is the garbage of a grudge, consider whether you need to ask for an apology or extend one. If there is the stink of unresolved conflict, consider whether you need to ask for forgiveness or extend it. The personal and disciplined choice to extend and accept forgiveness is a yielding to a higher goal than self. It’s a letting go of “me” to an awareness of “we”. It is an awareness that forgiving and forgiven are part of the ebb and flow of a higher standard.

GOMO!^® honors the best investment of your time and energy for goal achievement and for relationship strength. Consider whether holding on to memories of deceit and betrayal adds value to reaching your goals and protecting your relationships. Your answer is, most probably, no. Because you see, the past is not your destination. An inability to “Get Over it; Move On!” from the trash of the past keeps any of us from dreaming and achieving the grand possibilities of our futures. There is a client company where a manager in charge of a work unit was vying with another manager for a promotion in that area. The promotion was given to the other manager. There was relationship history that could have led to hard feelings on the part of the manager passed over. Rather than responding with bitterness, she chose words and actions to support the new director. After a few weeks, she pursued a different position in a different area for a better match between the company, her skill set and her career goals. Many still speak admiringly of her poise and dignity to GOMO!^®.

GOMO!^® is good for your health. According to Eileen O’Connor, author of the article, Forgiveness Heals the Hurt, studies funded by the Templeton Forgiveness Research Campaign are monitoring and measuring the physiological effects of forgiveness and its benefits. At Hope College in Michigan, researchers find that blood pressure, heart rates and muscle tensions increase when subjects are asked to remember past grudges and anger. But you probably don’t need to read this for that proof. Instead, you can reflect on the calm you have felt when you’ve chosen to forgive and move on.

Make a choice for GOMO!^®. It’s about forgetting to judge, choosing to let go, and skipping the blame game. What a great way to take care of yourself.

By: Susan B. Wilson, President, Executive Strategies